Survival Holiday Guide for the Sensitive & Neurodivergent: 10 Tips for Overcoming Overwhelm by Julie Bjelland, LMFT
The holiday season is often portrayed as a magical time filled with joy, connection, and celebration. But for sensitive and neurodivergent people, the reality can feel quite different. This time of year may bring unique challenges that can leave us feeling overwhelmed, drained, and longing for the comfort of our usual routines.
If you feel deeply, get easily overstimulated, or find social gatherings exhausting, know that you’re not alone. In this guide, we’ll explore common challenges you might face during the holidays and offer practical strategies to help you navigate the season with more ease and self-compassion. Plus, discover some of my favorite self-care products that help me support my sensitive nervous system.
Overwhelm & Sensory Overload
The holidays' sights, sounds, and smells can be intense—bright, flashing lights, crowded stores filled with visual overload, and loud music can trigger sensory overload.
Social gatherings often mean too much talking, listening, and stimulation. This can leave you feeling drained, especially if you’re sensitive to noise or social dynamics.
Energy Exhaustion from Socializing
Extended visits with family and friends can be taxing, especially if you need regular alone time to recharge.
The pressure to be "on" and engage in small talk or extended conversations can quickly deplete your energy reserves. (If I push past my limits, I usually feel nauseous).
Navigating Changes in Routine
For many neurodivergent people, changes in routines and environments can feel unsettling. Traveling, staying in unfamiliar places, or even having guests in your home can be disruptive.
The unpredictability of holiday plans and last-minute changes can heighten anxiety.
Emotional Overload
Holidays can stir up complex emotions, especially if you have challenging family dynamics, unresolved grief, or feel the pressure to meet others’ expectations.
The expectation to be cheerful can feel heavy, especially if you’re struggling with the emotional weight of the season.
Decision Fatigue & Gift Giving
The pressure to find the "perfect" gifts, navigate crowded stores, or spend hours shopping online can be overwhelming.
Decision fatigue can set in quickly when faced with so many choices, leading to stress and burnout.
10 Practical Tips to Help You Survive the Holidays
1. Honor Your Need for Alone Time
Schedule regular breaks during social gatherings to decompress. Find a quiet room or take a walk outside to reset.
If you’re traveling or staying with family, plan for moments where you can retreat and recharge.
2. Set Boundaries Ahead of Time
Communicate your needs with loved ones before gatherings. Let them know if you’ll need to leave early or take breaks.
Practice saying "no" to invitations or activities that feel too draining.
3. Create a Sensory Toolkit
Bring noise-canceling headphones, a weighted blanket, calming essential oils, or a favorite fidget toy to soothe your nervous system when you start feeling overwhelmed.
Consider using sunglasses or blue light-blocking glasses if holiday lights or screens feel too harsh on your eyes.
4. Plan Self-Care Days
Schedule downtime before and after major gatherings. Use this time to rest, reflect, and recharge.
Engage in grounding activities like yoga, deep breathing, journaling, or simply lying in a dark room to reduce overstimulation.
5. Set Realistic Expectations
Let go of the pressure to meet societal or familial expectations of how the holidays "should" look. Focus on what feels right for you.
Give yourself permission to create your own traditions that align with your needs and values.
6. Use Technology Wisely
If in-person gatherings feel too draining, consider attending virtually or sending your love in other creative ways.
For those who struggle with phone calls or video chats, set time limits or use messaging instead.
7. Prioritize Comfort
Wear clothing that feels good on your skin, and don’t hesitate to bring your own comfort items (like a favorite blanket or cozy socks) to gatherings.
If certain foods are overwhelming, bring a dish that you know you’ll enjoy to share with others.
8. Take Care of Your Body
Stay hydrated, get enough rest, and nourish your body with foods that make you feel good.
Movement can be a great way to release pent-up energy, whether it’s dancing to your favorite song, stretching, or taking a walk in nature.
9. Plan for the Aftermath
Recognize that you might feel depleted after the holidays. Plan some low-stimulation days afterward to allow yourself to fully recover.
Acknowledge your efforts with self-compassion—navigating the holidays as a sensitive or neurodivergent person takes courage and resilience.
10. Focus on the Joys of the Season
It’s easy to get caught up in the stress of the holidays, but try to anchor yourself in the small, sensory joys—like the smell of your favorite food or the cozy warmth of a cup of tea.
Thoughtful Gift Ideas to Support Your Sensitive Nervous System
I’ve created a page of my favorite calming and sensory-friendly products. These products can bring comfort to your life or make great gifts for your sensitive and neurodivergent loved ones. I've even included some special discounts for you!
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Wishing you a holiday season filled with self-compassion, ease, and moments of joy.