Episode 149: Emotional Wounding Support During Hard Times with Julie & Willow
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Resources & Links Mentioned in Episode
'Tips & Tools to Thrive' Topic in the community
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Show Notes
HSPs high on my Sensitivity Scale tend to absorb the world's pain. Plus life can hit us with a bunch of emotional wounds or hard times all at impacting both our physical and mental health.
Examples of Emotional Wounding…
Painful world events and images seen on the news
Social media, discrimination, hatred…
Death or pain of loved ones including animals and even trees.
Negative self talk and self-criticism
Medical or mental health challenges
What helps?
When life stressors knock us down, here are loving ways to support yourself…
think about emotional injury as the same as physical injury in the sense that it involves a time of care and nurturing healing.
lovingly acknowledge the emotions, check in with your inner child with self-compassion, like how we might respond to children when they need support—loving, caring, gentle, patient, compassionate.
remind yourself that the intensity of the feeling is temporary and won't feel this way forever.
accept yourself as a deep feeler, think of the ebb and flow of nature, and accept your flow.
stop your to-do list and focus instead on... "what do I need at this moment." Letting go of some responsibilities allows us to focus on our needs. It's ok to say no or change plans.
up your self care and also spend a lot of time in nature, in water or near water, and with trees and quiet places. It's HSP medicine for most everything.
slow down, let go, and ask for help if needed, prioritize tending to your wellness.
cuddle pets, practice mindfulness, stare at the sky and watch the clouds move slowly, listen to the birds, observe tiny plants, leaves, blooms, make time to see the sunrise and sunset. The little things fill up our positivity tank to support the extra stressors.
journal to reflect and process, weighted blankets, herbal teas, cuddling pets
focus on the basics when exhausted…hydrating, making sure to eat something healthy, take baths, drink warm tea, lay under a weighted blanket, and allow yourself to just be.
be kind and patient with yourself and not add additional pressures or expectations. We can turn to nature to remind us that the season of growth will come again, and it's ok to experience some dormancy and internal time as we work through whatever we might be experiencing.
Limit news watching and balance it with positivity fill-ups (8 positives to neutralize 1 negative)
Put action into helping and look for the helpers doing amazing things from their heart
communities and podcasts like this one!
connection to kind-hearted HSPs (join our live podcast episodes, events, and monthly Meet and Greets)
more tools and support means you’ll be more resilient and balanced, learning conscious living choices that work for HSPs.
Transcript
Transcription by Kristin Cole
Julie: Welcome to a live recording of the HSP podcast. I’m Julie Bjelland and today’s topic is Emotional Wounding Support During Hard Times. We’re here with Willow McIntosh.
Willow: Hey Julie, great to be here. Thanks for having me.
Julie: It’s so lovely to have our members here live from the Sensitive Empowerment Community. We get to chat before we start and that’s always fun to connect and we really love that you’re here with us. Just the energy that it creates when we’re together is just so fun. Right, Willow?
Willow: Absolutely. Makes such a difference for us to know you guys are here supporting, asking your questions and holding the space. Wonderful!
Julie: Yeah, I love that part. What a great time to talk about emotional wounding. I know that people – HSPs especially – are really impacted, especially those that are scoring high on my sensitivity scale, like I am high up there. We really have a tendency to absorb pain around us. We absorb the world’s pain and it can be difficult. I also wanted to give some examples of emotional wounding. Right, Willow, let’s give some examples?
Willow: Yeah, absolutely, that sounds great. I’m so pleased we’re diving into this topic.
Julie: Things like painful world events, images that we’re seeing on the news, discrimination, hatred, some negative social media experiences. Many of us have experienced a death or pain of loved ones – and I’m including animals and even trees - a lot of us are very connected to trees. Even negative self-talk and criticism can be emotionally wounding for us if we’re having self-criticism. And of course, health issues (including physical health and mental health challenges) can all create emotional wounding, right Willow?
Willow: Yeah, absolutely. I think it’s so helpful for us to openly talk about this because I think for much of us as HSPs we tend to struggle alone with this. We feel sometimes that it can alienate us a little because we’re experiencing things so deeply and we think “now why is this affecting me so much?” We almost get embarrassed to talk about that. So I think it’s really important for us to normalize this a little bit and to help all of us to realize that this is normal for us. There are ways that we can help manage this. As you say, Julie, there’s so many different things that can affect us and for us to be aware of that and to do what we need to to really manage that.
Interestingly, the place where I’m staying here we had to have a tree removed because the roots were causing some issues underneath the property and there was no way around it. It had to happen. I could feel what was happening and it was affecting me. After the tree came down, I spent a little bit of time with the tree and I could really feel the energy of what had happened there.
So while sometimes these things can feel trivial to others, we actually really do feel these things and it’s important to acknowledge this and for us to really be there for each other and to recognize that it’s ok and that there are ways to handle these things.
Julie: Yeah, and who’s relating for those of you listening live? How many of us have felt like the way that we react or the way we experience something is really different than a lot of people around us. A lot of us have gotten messages that there’s something wrong with the way we’re experiencing that. And I want to validate that. I think that’s a big part of our hopes today. We’re talking about things from high-level sensitivity - and 20% of the population has high sensitivity - but I’m even talking about the top 5%. I think a lot of us in the Sensitive Empowerment Community are probably top 5% sensitivity. Way up there! So even our experiences would be different than those lower on the scale.
We’re getting a lot of “completely resonating.” Elisha says “Absolutely.” Becca says “Yes, maam.” It’s really incredible how much we can get impacted by things and in the opposite too. Willow, when they planted a bunch of trees in front of me, I literally cried. I was so happy to have these trees near me and it really is a big deal for us. I remember even things like when my kids were little and we’d take them to the swimming pool. If there would be bees that landed in the water dying, I would be so impacted. I’d have to go through the whole pool and save as many of the bees as I could. It’s a part of me.
Willow: Yes, I’m exactly the same! There’s bees here that collect honey from the local trees along the beach here. Whenever I swim first thing in the morning, every morning I’m rescuing a bee. If I’m watching an animal, I can feel it. I can’t sit there and watch it. I have to do something about it. I think when we’re having these experiences, it is about us managing our own pain and our own discomfort and making sure we’re doing what we can. But it’s also the awareness that we care very deeply and we quite literally feel to such an extent that we do. And isn’t that beautiful? Isn’t that wonderful that we have the capacity to want to help and to want to do something about it because of this capacity that we have to feel so deeply.
Julie: Absolutely! I’ve always believed that HSPs are going to make a difference in the world because we feel things so deeply. That’s what is beautiful about feeling deeply. I think really being able to acknowledge and normalize that is important. For me, I also want to go through several things that help. And for all of you out there taking notes along the way, I want you to know that I’ll put all these things that help in the show notes and you’ll be able to find it at HSPpodcast.com
One of the things that I want to start with is - and this is a new concept for some people, some of you in the community have definitely heard me talk about it – thinking about emotional injury as the same as physical injury. In the sense that it involves a time of care and nurturing healing. That’s a big one, right?
Willow: Yes, absolutely. To give us the space and time that we need to heal in the same way we would heal a physical injury. Absolutely. And to recognize that the time it takes and the care and the attention in the same way. I completely agree.
Julie: Yeah. That’s important to acknowledge. So if we’re getting messages from other people that the way we’re responding is wrong, let’s not listen to them. Let’s listen to the other HSPs that experience this in the same way.
Linn is making a comment too about passing a snail and needing to stop and help it. Oh my gosh, I do the same thing! If I see a snail on the sidewalk, I’ll have to set it off to the side so nobody steps on it. This is our real experience as HSPs and I love that we’re talking about it.
Some more things are to lovingly acknowledge the emotion. This is a big one for me because I know I didn’t use to be able to do this. I didn’t used to be able to think of my emotional wounding in the same way as physical wounding. I didn’t think of it as something that I could lovingly acknowledge. Instead, I used to be at a place – I think a lot of us are like this until we do this deeper work, understand our trait, spend time with HSPs – is thinking there’s something wrong with how we experience things. It’s so intense for us and possibly in our upbringing we’ve been told “Why are you reacting that way? Why are you so sensitive? What’s wrong with you? It’s not so big of a deal.” So you get these messages that you’re feeling something so extreme inside of you and you’re being told you’re invalidated for that experience.
I think a big mission for me and Willow is we want to validate these experiences. This is how we experience the world too. Things like checking in with your inner child, with self-compassion and how we might respond to children. If we see a child hurting, we’re going to be loving, caring, gentle, patient, compassionate. These are things that we can train ourselves to be toward ourselves. And I had to train myself and I know when I went through – I’m coming out of some health challenges that I had – and when I look back at what I was feeling in the moment, it was so difficult. If I didn’t have self-compassion, I would’ve really gone to a very difficult place because if we’re already hurting in some way and then we’re being self-critical, we’re really just going deeper and deeper into really hard places so that self-compassion that we talk about is huge.
Willow: That is one of the most important pieces around this, Julie. When we add on extra self-judgment, it makes everything so much harder to come through. So when we’re having either a physical pain, emotional pain, spiritual pain, whatever it may be, it’s initially to recognize “Ok, this is going to take a bit of time to come through this and I need that extra level of self-care in the way that you’re describing it right now, Julie.” I think that when we add on judgment or we add on self-criticism or that we’re making it wrong in some way, or we’re discounting our feelings, that is when it gets really difficult. And then it becomes a much bigger entity to come through.
Julie: Definitely. It magnifies it in a way that makes it unbearable. Often times, I think we go through the process. When I used to work with clients as a psychotherapist, I would work a lot in these areas with clients. A lot of times we’re hearing messages that we received from our caregivers as children. I often say to go through a filtration process. Filter out “are those your genuine feelings or were those messages your received?”
A lot of times you can tell the difference – HSPs are the most compassionate people in the world towards others and really struggle a lot with self-compassion because we tend to be so hard on ourselves. So think about how you would feel about someone else in that situation who’s emotionally wounded. You’d probably be really compassionate and really supportive with them. So try to bring some of that energy back to yourself. That’s really helpful.
One thing I know that really helped me during times that were really hard for me were reminding myself that the intensity of the feeling is temporary and it won’t feel that way forever. That sounds like such a simple statement but that changed my life. Acknowledging that that emotion that I'm experiencing is temporary. It used to be when I was in an emotion, it feels like you’re going to feel that way forever and it’s going to be that painful forever.
Going through my recent challenges, I was able to do that for myself this time. To say “You know what, it’s not gonna always feel like this.” I had some kind of level of awareness this time that I didn’t used to have and that really supported me through the experience.
Willow: Amazing! I think that is such a powerful insight. That wonderful expression “This too shall pass.” I find that really helps me too. If my energy is low or there’s a difficulty, there’s something happening, this too shall pass. As I say that, I think, “Ok, yeah, this isn’t permanent” but it’s so hard to think that in the moment. We think, “Oh my God, I’m always going to feel like that.” But it changes. Of course it changes.
We’re almost parenting ourselves a little bit. When something difficult happens, it’s an opportunity to switch into our own higher sense of caregiving for ourselves and utilizing these tools that you’re sharing and all the amazing other tools that you have, Julie, in your resources. I think that’s the opportunity. Rather than descending, it’s actually to know that we have everything within us to care for ourselves. It’s just a matter of switching our awareness a little bit. Exactly in the examples you’re giving right here, Julie, is how you’ve come through and what you have recently with that higher sense of awareness and knowing. I think it’s so important for us to give that to ourselves.
Julie: Yeah, and that was part of my experience too. I felt everything so intensely and I had so much suffering in my early life that it became really important for me to create resources that help other sensitive people. That’s one of the things that shows up the most in our Sensitive Empowerment Community. A lot of people say when they join, they’re kind of surprised at how comfortable it is to be able to feel this sense of belonging with people who get it and to be able to talk openly without having anyone invalidate you. To be in a situation that’s validating is life-changing.
And really accepting ourselves as deep feelers. I like to think of it in terms of the ebb and flow of nature and accepting your flow. That’s something that’s been big for me. I tend to get really low energy in the winters and I used to get so upset with myself that I was experiencing life like that. Then I started looking at the trees and thinking, “Wow, they all lost their leaves, they’re in this sense of dormancy.” It’s so interesting that I cycle in the same way. I started thinking of it in the cycle of nature and as soon as spring comes and all those blossoms are out, I start to have my energy back and I start to feel better. So what if I could just simply accept my ebb and flow of nature instead of being hard on myself? I’m not hard on the trees that are losing their leaves and all the plants that go into dormancy. We’re not hard on that, right?
Willow: Absolutely, absolutely, it’s so true. Sometimes I think that we feel like we should always be in control of ourselves. We should be able to control and manage ourselves and our feelings. When something goes wrong or we feel bad it’s like, “why can’t I make that go away?” or “why can’t I change it?” You’re absolutely right. We’re in flow exactly as nature is. Having that element of equanimity in a sense – that’s not an easy thing to master at all – but to have that sense of “this is how things are at the moment” and to have self-compassion as we’re going through those ebbs and flows.
I think that’s something actually interesting that you touched on just now, Julie, which was around recognizing what are our feelings and what are not our feelings. So whether that is messages or conditioning that we had from our caregivers, or whether it’s actually feelings and experiences that are going on outside of us that we tend to own as ours.
So many of us are highly empathic – and there is a phrase known as clairempathy which I’m sure many of us here are familiar with, which is actually an ability to literally feel what other people are feeling. I think when the world is going through difficult times or even when we are around people who are going through difficult times, sometimes by taking on the feelings of others, we feel that they are our own and therefore we end up processing other people’s feelings. There’s a difference there between having compassion and supporting others and knowing when something is not ours, and therefore, it re-empowers us and gives us that strength and capacity again to act accordingly so we’re not responding inappropriately.
Julie: I’m so glad you’re talking about that. That is such a good one and it’s hard to distinguish, especially if we’re living with someone who’s going through a hard time or we’re watching too much news and we’re seeing a lot of visual images that can get really distressing until we’re falling apart.
Elisha’s asking a question about how or when do we know when we need to go or walk away from a situation that’s so emotional and intense or is it just more inner work? For example, if it’s related to a relationship.
I think some of what we’re going to talk about right now might answer that question because it’s important for us to work at the practice of separating our energy from other people and then going internal and doing that inner work, doing that grounding work.
When I was in the hardest part of what I was going through, I would do things like stop your to-do list for example – I know HSPs we just love being productive and want to control the outcome of everything – but we have to stop our to-do list because we need to focus on things like, “What do I need at this moment?” Letting go of some of those responsibilities, it gives us a chance to focus on what we need. It’s ok to say no, it’s ok to change plans. How many times as HSPs that maybe we had a bunch of energy when we said yes to plans and then when the plan came around, we’re really depleted. It’s ok to say no and in fact, it’s important. We have to take care of our own needs because if we’re falling apart, we can’t help anybody.
So that practice of really upping your self-care, spending a lot of time in nature. We were talking about this before we were recording, Willow, about water - being in water, near water, near trees, near quiet places. We really benefit from that on a daily basis, spending a little time making sure we’re slowing down. That we’re letting go. That we’re asking for help if we need it. Overall, really tending to and prioritizing our own wellness. For example, I’m a parent and if I couldn’t take care of my own needs, how am I going to take care of my kids in the way that I want to take care of them? And my relationships? And my greater work? If I was constantly glued to the news and falling apart at all the images I was seeing, I wouldn’t be able to create resources that help HSPs. I just use that as an example that there are ways for you to make positive change in the world but we’ve got to take care of our own wellbeing first.
Willow: Beautiful, absolutely right. Yes, it has to be that way. We have to make sure we’re tending to our own needs. In the same way, it’s a simple analogy, but in airplanes they say that if the oxygen mask comes down, put your own on first before you help your child. That feels a bit counterintuitive but the problem is if you pass out, you can’t put your mask on your child. So it’s similar in that way that we have to make sure that, as you say, we’re tending to our own needs first to make sure we have the strength and the power to help others.
One of the things that has really helped me over the years is when I find myself getting into a mix of emotions and if I’m around others or I’m in a relationship, whatever it may be, I ask myself the simple question, “Is this mine?” Very quickly I can tell if it is or it isn’t. But it’s only when I actually ask myself the question that I think, “Ok, this actually isn’t mine.” Then it changes my experience internally and it gives me a whole new set of resources to be of much better service to people around me.
Julie: I love that and that’s a powerful statement. To pause and say, “Is this mine?” That is such a powerful statement. I find that when the people closest to me are hurting that is the most difficult for me and I sometimes need to separate my space to be able to even ask that question. Go into a grounding state, being able to check in and say, “Is this mine? What’s happening? What’s coming up for me?”
This is something I have been doing a lot over the past couple of years that was different than it ever was before because my self-talk used to be negative as a lot of HSPs experience. Now, when I’m feeling something that’s bothering me, upsetting, maybe I’ve absorbed something or I don’t even know where it’s coming from, I just sometimes pause and I put my hand on my heart, take some deep breaths, and I say, “Ok, what’s going on?” Almost like I’m talking to my inner child. It’s like, “Ok, you’re upset about something. That makes sense.” So go through and validate my own experience and ask, “What do I need right now? Ok, is this mine? Is this theirs? What is this?”
So I’m giving myself a chance just like you would talk to a friend to help them sort out what they’re experiencing. We can do that for ourselves also even through journaling, talking to friends, talking to a therapist, all those kinds of things. If you don’t have a therapist, hopefully you know we have an HSP Practitioners Directory on my website that you can find an HSP therapist or healer. I really think that all HSPs benefit as long as you find the right match.
Some of my things that I did too during things that were hard for me were cuddling my pets, practicing mindfulness, slowing down my movements, slowing down what I was doing, looking at the sky a lot - whether it’s the sunset, sunrise, watching the clouds move slowly. I feed birds so I love listening to the birds and focusing on all those different sounds. Even looking at little plants. If you can’t get to nature one day, maybe you can bring some plants around your home and really connect with them, the little leaves and blooms. And make time for those little things to fill up that positivity tank.
Many of you have heard me say this before but if you haven’t heard it yet, it takes eight positives to neutralize one negative. So that’s a lot! Negative stuff just falls into our lap. But the way the brain works, you have to actually have to focus on those positives for 15-20 seconds for them to actually absorb. When you’re looking at that sunset, really soak it in, take that time to let it soak in and really feel that positivity fill-up. What are some of the things you do, Willow, that are your positivity fill-ups?
Willow: Julie, they’re quite similar actually. I find that it makes such a difference for me when I do these things. Like when I’m busy and I’m being productive and I feel my energy shifting, I think, “I really need to take a break. I know that I actually need to get this done.” But then I’ve learned now that just taking that time. Or if I’m going through a difficult stage in life, by taking that time out to be in nature and just to experience the energy of nature, I find is incredibly healing. It’s literally state shifting and it can happen so quickly. Like getting into the sea for me is one of the big ones that immediately shifts my state. I find it really difficult to maintain a bad mood when I jump in the water!
Julie: I was just saying that to my friend the other day. I was like, “I feel like it’s impossible to be in a bad mood looking at the ocean.”
Willow: Yeah, it really is. I feel there’s something that happens - there’s probably a very interesting study or dissertation to be done on this – but there is definitely something that happens to us energetically when we’re in nature. We seem to merge with it, we seem to tune in. I find it incredibly healing. So that’s definitely one of the things. Swimming is one for me.
Walking a lot, I walk every day. That really helps to give me space around my thoughts. It re-energizes me. I love the adventure of walking. What I’m going to find, what I’m going to see.
Journaling for me is a huge one! Journaling is something that I do on a very regular basis, no matter what I’m going through, whether I’m having a great time or whether I’m having a difficulty, whatever it may be. I’m able to have really in depth conversations with myself through journaling. I’m able to access a higher intelligence in myself. I can ask myself questions and I can see the why or the end for the yes or no on the page. I expand or contract in my mind’s eye which guides me as to whether something is a yes or a no. Being able to actually organize my thoughts and just to work through things. Sometimes if I feel overwhelmed or there’s too much going on in my head, if I just start to write it down, it really helps me to just quiet that busyness and I then can re-center. For me, it’s a huge one.
Julie: Yeah, journaling is great. Journaling, talking, all those things bring us to step out of our emotional brain into our cognitive brain that makes more sense to us. Makes us be able to understand what we’re experiencing.
Kristin’s agreeing with you. She loves walking, running, dancing. I think movement is a big one too. I do a lot of walking also. I also like what Caroline says about visiting local nurseries. That is something I love doing too! Looking at all the beautiful plants and then each season different things are blooming. I love doing that.
I love my weighted blanket. I find that’s incredibly soothing and relaxing. We’ve talked some about having herbal teas, cuddling pets, taking baths. And when you’re in a state that’s more than you can bear in the moment, thinking of really the very basics. Just make sure you’re drinking water, that you’re getting some food in. Maybe you take a bath. Doing real basics if you’re really in a moment that things just seem very difficult.
Maybe your success one day is that you took a shower, and you ate something, and you drank some water. Let that be your success. Things will get better. Things will not always be as they are on those really hard days. Make sure you’re being kind and loving and patient with yourself so you’re not adding additional pressures or expectations, things like that. Really follow your flow.
I really love the concept of listening to your body everyday. What does it feel like? What does it need that day? Paying attention to that rather than the to-do list is a really good thing. We had talked about limiting news watching. For HSPs, I think visually seeing images – there’s a lot of great things happening in the world too, of course there’s terrible, just horrendous things too, but there’s also a lot of great things happening in the world – so we often say look for the helpers. Look for those stories. When you’re taking care of your own needs, you can become someone who is making positive change in the world too.
Willow: Yeah, beautiful. I love that. The mainstream news, I never ever watch that. What I’ve found is that there are alternatives that give me the information that I need. There are particular sources that I go to that give me so I have updates, so I know what’s happening. There’s a few of them that I use. There’s a British comedian called Russell Brand whose YouTube Channel is all about current affairs and what’s happening in the world. I’m able to actually get a really interesting picture of what’s happening through his depiction of the information he’s gathering. One example that I use.
There’s another resource called Good News Network that’s listing great things that are happening in the world. I think that’s so important for us to get that balance. It’s like, “Yes, there’s a lot happening,” but to remember that mainstream media is all about the bad stuff. There’s no good stuff there – very rarely. That’s not the picture of the world. It’s not all bad. There is a whole other side to it and I think that’s very important for us to remember. If we get too stuck in the bad, it’s almost like, “Oh my God, the world is bad!” and that’s not the case. So I agree with that. Definitely balanced media.
Julie: Yes, totally. I love what Kristin says, “Just logging into our community is a stream of positive news.” I love that, Kristin! Thanks for sharing that. Yes, that’s what we try to do in the Sensitive Empowerment Community. We’re actually really conscious about our positivity fill-ups. We’re conscious about how we write our posts. We have a post that’s called the Uniqueness of an Empowered Community versus a Dumping Community because social media’s often a dumping community. It’s a very stressful place to be for a lot of sensitive people.
We know that news outlets and social media often focus on the negative because that’s somewhat addicting in terms of how the brain is. The brain is first focused on the negative because that’s how our ancestors survived, by focusing on all the things that could go wrong. But it’s really a conscious way of living to change some of that to make sure you’re also focusing on all the good things that are happening in the world. It’s such a huge thing.
I want to give the community to ask any questions that you might have. If you’ve already asked them and we haven’t seen them, go ahead and pop them into the comments now.
I also want to talk about a couple more things too while you guys are putting in your questions. It is important to spend time in communities that are safe and positive. That’s something that we really focus on a lot in our Sensitive Empowerment Community so I definitely hope you all consider joining us, we warmly welcome you.
We do virtual meet-ups which are really fun where we can connect to each other. We do our live podcasts there, we do events, we have a lot of fun things coming up. Some yoga, painting, as well as of course education about the trait and how to thrive. We even have a topic in the community that’s called Tips and Tools to Thrive. Everything that I experience and the tools and tips that I use, I write that in this topic in the community so that I’m sharing my experiences.
Also, I want to point everybody in the direction of my Brain Training course and the HSP Toolbox course. I think both of those courses could be really excellent for supporting you further. Brain Training is really good for reducing anxiety. We see a lot of HSPs are able to reduce their anxiety within the first week or two of this 8-week program. The HSP Toolbox course gives you a lot of daily tools – it’s the daily tools that I’ve developed that I use – that we’ve grown together as a community to use. You can find all of that www.sensitiveconnection.com including our podcast episodes. There’s tons of free resources on my website as well all focused on supporting HSPs.
Willow: Absolutely. I really recommend these resources. Sometimes we hear these things – if you’re new to the community or you haven’t had the opportunity or the inspiration to try one of these courses. What can be so powerful is that it only takes one or two new awarenesses – a new phrase, a new affirmation. Something that’s been discovered through years of working and being with HSPs, sometimes you can get shifts that make a massive difference to things. Like over the years, I’ve come across the different resources and tools and techniques that I have used and they can be life-changing sometimes. So it really is worth exploring and trying these things because there’s no way of knowing quite what’s there until you give it a go and it really can make a massive difference.
Julie: Yeah, just being together too with HSPs is so powerful. All of you that are with us live right now, it’s incredible because if you think about it, you ventured into a group, you did that intentionally, and you came into one of these live events that we do. That’s really amazing and it shows the kind of people that you are. That you want to bring something into your life that’s a positive, that you’re making that intentional empowered choice. I think that’s such a beautiful thing.
We all start from this personal foundation of supporting ourselves through the world and as sensitive people - you guys have heard me say this a lot - the world is not set up for sensitivity. Many of us have been invalidated for our experiences and it’s really magical and important to spend time with other HSPs no matter where you’re doing that. It’s important to do that. I’m really proud of the community that we’ve developed here. I love that we’re together from all over the world and that we support each other. It’s just such a loving space and it’s a beautiful space to spend time. We definitely hope to welcome you there.
Anything else you’d like to say on the subject or any other questions that the community has? Willow, do you have anything that you’d like to share?
Willow: I think what you’re saying around the community as well. I completely agree with that. It makes such a difference. We don’t have to be in this experience of being an HSP alone. It’s not something we should be doing. There’s a difference between introverted and needing our own space, and being disconnected from our tribe. Perhaps if we don’t like being online or social media and the business of it, there is a big difference in being online around people who are really like-minded who really get our needs and understand how we experience the world, understand the things we aspire to. It makes a huge difference.
I experience that a lot in the work that I do with HSPs. Get them first together in a group and get them chatting. It’s like, “Wow, it’s so good to actually be honest about what I’m seeing and thinking and feeling and there’s someone else who thinks and feels and sees things in the same way.” It makes massive changes. I really really recommend it, definitely.
Julie: It’s like we’re being intentional about what we’re exposing ourselves to. Right? Like who we’re around makes a difference, how we’re supporting ourselves through what we’re going through. Every single one of us has experienced emotional wounding and there are ways to support us through that. To be intentional and conscious about it really does make a big change.
Willow, you and I have talked a lot about our early life and how neither one of us would be doing what we’re doing right now if we hadn’t really supported ourselves, taught ourselves these tools, really became intentional about how we take care of ourselves. It makes a difference in how we experience life as sensitive people. It just really does make a difference because we can have control over some of those things about what we expose ourselves to, how we support ourselves through what we’re going through.
Most of all, to know that you’re not alone. There’s 1.4 billion sensitive people in the world! I love that we get to be together from all over the world. It’s just so important so just remember that. Remember how special you are. Remember that you’re needed and valuable and that there’s ways to support yourself and get support around emotional wounding. That’s how we get through this life as sensitive people and can be part of the change the world needs because I believe HSPs are the ones to do that.
Willow: Yes, absolutely! And the more that we can look after ourselves and the more that we can understand who we really are, the more we come into touch with our values, our abilities, our gifts, and especially, our place here in the world. We really are needed, more than ever. We say that a lot but there are a lot of changes happening right now and our voices are really needed. The more that we can be in our power and self-love and strength, the more our voices are going to be heard and the more we’re going to trust our voice.
Julie: Absolutely. Willow and I have so many wonderful podcast episodes we’ve done together and I definitely invite you guys to come over and see them if you go to sensitiveconnection.com, you’re going to see the podcast and you’ll see a link that says Julie and Willow and that will bring you to a page that will show all the podcasts we’ve done together. We’ve had so many wonderful conversations. I’ve really enjoyed doing this with you Willow and want to thank the Sensitive Empowerment Community for being here with us and being able to be in your energetic space is always a real gift. Just love you guys.
For anyone that’s out there experiencing emotional wounding, I want to send you love and light and hugs and let you know that we’re here for you. Just knowing that there’s sensitive people in the world that care deeply about you and your experience in the world. I just want you all to know that.
Willow: Beautiful, well said. Me too. We’re here for you and you are here for you too. By allowing yourself to learn ways to manage yourself, manage your energy and look after yourself. There’s always a way through no matter what you’re experiencing and there are always people around that can help.
Julie: Yes, definitely. Get those supportive people around you. There’s so many great comments going through the chat. I’m going to upload all those comments and put them into the community and read through them afterwards too. I want to send all of you lots of love. I just love who you are as sensitive people and I love that you’re in the world and I love that we get to share our journeys together. I want to send a big love to all of you. Thank you for being with us today! Love you guys. Bye!
About the Hosts
Julie Bjelland is a psychotherapist specializing in high sensitivity, Author of The Empowered Highly Sensitive Person, host of The HSP Podcast, and founder of the Sensitive Empowerment Community. Her books, blog, online courses, and free Masterclasses have helped thousands of highly sensitive people (HSPs) worldwide reduce their challenges, access their gifts, and discover their significant value to thrive to their fullest potential. Her HSPs in Heart-Centered Business Group connects and supports HSP healers and practitioners. Julie loves connecting in her Sensitive Empowerment Community and warmly invites you to join this positive, safe, and welcoming space. JulieBjelland.com ❤️🌈❤️ (she/her)
Highly sensitive people thrive quickly with the right tools and I have loved helping highly sensitive people (HSPs) around the world reduce anxiety and thrive to their fullest potential. The techniques I have developed come from years of working with highly sensitive people all over the world and have been extremely successful for the clients and students I work with. Our life gets a lot better and so does the life of those around us when we are thriving and your sensitive self is beautiful and valuable. We need you in the world. ~Julie
Willow McIntosh is the founder of Inluminance and leader of the High Sensory Intelligence movement. Unique circumstances during Willow’s childhood lead to the burying of his authentic self and complete misalignment to the work he was destined for. He began to carve his own path into understanding how people with sensory processing sensitivity can learn to use their genetic traits to their advantage. As an adult this lead to a lifelong enquiry and practise into learning powerful energetic alignment techniques to re-engage with the authentic self. Willow believes that all people with the trait have the ability to tap into a unique skill that draws on a deeper sensory perception. Founded in their own life experience and self development they have the capacity to facilitate great transformation and development in others. Willow is on a mission to awaken us to the responsibility we have to utilise the abilities it affords in business, governments and leadership. Having successfully facilitated the development of seven figure businesses Willow’s practise has taken him all over the world. Speaking internationally, training in a broad range of fields and facilitating others for more than twenty years. Willow now specialises in facilitating people with the trait to activate them into service in alignment with their gifts and purpose and to support them to take their own businesses to the next level towards automation and leadership.
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