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Episode 191: Grieving the Loss of A Parent with Krista O'Reilly-Davi-Digui

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GRIEF REACTIONS, DURATION, AND TASKS OF MOURNING: Click Here for PDF

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Summary In this episode, Krista discusses the topic of grieving the loss of a parent. She covers the messiness of grief, the factors that influence grief experiences, and the four tasks of mourning: accepting the loss, processing grief, adjusting to a new reality, and finding a lasting connection. She also shares the six needs of a grieving person, including having pain witnessed, expressing feelings, releasing guilt, addressing old wounds, integrating pain and love, and finding meaning in time. Krista emphasizes the importance of healthy boundaries and self-care during the grieving process. In this conversation, Krista discusses the different stages of grief and provides guidance on navigating the grieving process after the death of a parent. She emphasizes the importance of self-care, asking for help, and simplifying one's life during this time. Krista also highlights the challenges of acute grief, including practical tasks and the need for internal and external resources. She addresses the concept of secondary losses and the emotional intensity of grief. Additionally, she explores themes such as conflict, delayed grief, and the fluctuating nature of grief over time. Krista concludes by discussing the significance of creating safe containers for grief and finding meaning in the grieving process.

Takeaways

  • Grief is messy and varies widely depending on factors such as the relationship with the parent, culture, beliefs, coping skills, and social support.

  • The four tasks of mourning are accepting the loss, processing grief, adjusting to a new reality, and finding a lasting connection.

  • The six needs of a grieving person include having pain witnessed, expressing feelings, releasing guilt, addressing old wounds, integrating pain and love, and finding meaning in time.

  • Setting healthy boundaries and practicing self-care are crucial during the grieving process. Take care of yourself and prioritize self-care during the grieving process.

  • Don't be afraid to ask for help and seek support from others.

  • Simplify your life and lower the bar during acute grief.

  • Acknowledge and address secondary losses that may arise.

  • Recognize the emotional intensity of grief and allow yourself to experience a range of emotions.

  • Create safe containers to process and sit with your grief.

  • Find meaning in the grieving process and honor your parent's memory in your own way.

Chapters

00:00Understanding the Messy and Varied Nature of Grief

05:27Tasks of Mourning and Needs of a Grieving Person

10:54Anticipatory Grief and Emotional Boundaries

32:37Navigating Acute Grief: Practical and Emotional Challenges

36:44Internal and External Resources: Coping with Acute Grief

48:22Stages of Grief: Early and Mature Grief

01:02:34Empowering Support for Sensitive Individuals


Previous Episodes with Krista

Krista O'Reilly-Davi-Digui is a highly sensitive human, life partner of 30 years, and proud and affirming mom of 3, including her highly sensitive son, who died by suicide in 2019. She’s also a writer and Joyful Living Educator and lives on Treaty 6 Territory in central Alberta, Canada.  Through story, grief and trauma-informed education, and brave community, Krista’s words and work empower midlife women to befriend their True Selves and (re)claim freedom, health, and joy. https://www.alifeinprogress.ca/


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